Thinking About Jesus?

I just have to put this information out for all to see, there is a movie that a good friend of my put me onto, and it has opened in DC. It is a African-American portrayal of the story of Jesus Christ. Now I have yet to check it out, but here is the site for the information: http://www.colorofthecross.com/home.html Now, I know it is playing at Union Station among a few other spots, but you know we have to see it soon as it will be gone sooner than later.

You know it brings about alot of questions...the first being, that I know this is not the first time a black actor has portrayed Jesus, but perhaps the first time it is about to show before a national stage. But I will not open the discussion yet with regard to the race of Jesus...yet. But I will leave some thoughts to ponder. I do not know how many people read or went to the movies to see the DaVinci Code, (book by Dan Brown), but if you did than you will be able to feel me on my next series of thoughts. I read the book, then went to see the movie...and I can say from an objective point of view that I enjoyed the story. But I can never stop at the surface of anything...that would be a travesty, would it not? So, go deeper. If you know the story then the lineage of Jesus and his supposed wife Mary Magdelene still exists...in that they had a child and so on and so forth. Well, by the end of the book and the movie, one of the main characters is supposedly the heir of Jesus...and she is a white woman. Funny, or even more specifically a reinforcement of the "superiority" issue.

In this "superiority" issue, I mean in simple terms that no matter how much evidence seems to be blatantly obvious that Jesus was not white, or at least not a blonde and blue-eyed individual, the mere statement of that fact is enough to cause a hundred year war-no pun intended. But seriously, all may see God in the image of themselves, but as long as you definitively see him as unlike you than you will always, in my humble opinion, feel inferior to those that, well, you see God as. In other words, if you see God as a white man, and you are not that, than in some deep mental place you who believe in this God and praise him, understanding you are less than him will also see yourself, again in some deep internal place, as less than white men in general because, well...they are akin to God...and you, somehow, are not.

Therefore, the Passion of Christ, Jesus Christ Superstar, and the Da Vinci Code are all good stories and could be true if I were a blind man, but when they are cast with straight Anglo-Saxon men, then I must...if I am true to any sort of historical record-to include the Bible itself, I must look at those depictions for what they are-maintenance of the status quo. For if the son of God was white, then God himself must be...ridiculous right? Right? To me it is, but to all others who do not dig beyond the surface of things...then, well, I do not know. Again, I am not arguing the actual color of God, or Jesus for that matter, but simply for the allowance of the thought-that perhaps he could be different than that which has been depicted. There is no penalty for that, is there? For if there is, than my point has been proven. Think about it, and do not lose sight of what is beyond the depiction and that is the reality of the word.

Gains and Losses

On Sunday morning I had not realized that the time had changed, got up and got dressed to go to church-had not been in a few weeks, so I was ready to go by 11...still late but in route. However, as I listened to gospel music on the radio I was pleasantly surprised to learn that I was not only early, but extremely early due to the "fall back" feature of daylight savings time. That was a gain. I thought about the entire rationale behind daylight savings, and I do not agree or disagree with it-man's manipulation of time-but I did wonder if this was a practice known round the world. Did everyone fall back, and spring forward, or did they just remain constant. No gain or loss of an hour, just managing their lives through the continuum of time. None-the-less, I was happy to have fallen into an extra hour of time, and be seated at church nearly 30 minutes prior to service.

Church was a good experience...it most often is. Never bad, just sometimes not as inspiring as other times but yesterday was enriching. There were several reasons why. First, the church I attended, of which I am a common visitor but not member, had youth Sunday where children are the feature of the service. They sing, perform and speak to the congregation and that for me was delightful. Children are the most inspiring form of humanity to me. I mean, they love effortlessly and live with less prejudice than most of us. The world to them is new everyday, and the routine of life is not yet comprehensible. Their ignorance and naivety are the most beautiful illustration of innocence that can be found...and their love of God is without want, just because. The way children see the world, people, God...well, it always helps me to understand that in essence, the beauty of our existence is the fact that we are existing. Their vision, again, my gain.

Now in DC there are churches on every corner, facing one another and full to capacity every Sunday morning. If God is not acknowledged all week, then Sunday morning worship does its best to make up for the people's neglect. The entire experience is something to behold-the spirit truly moves people...into deep prayer, reflection, tears...a wealth of emotions are displayed openly and without regard for the opinion of on-lookers. Therefore, without question worship...or the ceremony thereof is a gain. Lastly, the sermon itself...the questions it brought forth in my mind and the self-evaluation it inspired was perhaps the biggest gain. The sermon was on shallowness, and Luke, Chapter 5 was the scripture from which the sermon was derived. Read it, and you will be moved.

Thus, my morning on Sunday was full of gains...no losses. Actually, my weekend was just that as well, full of gains and no true losses. It is in this thought, that the fear of loss is brought about. I believe in the balance of life, the yin and the yang of existence. Now some may argue that this notion is contradictory to the entire discussion of God above, I simply argue it is not. That even God wishes for his children to be balanced, and that in all that is good and positive there will be some bad and negative...it maintains the respect of his power and the the power within us all to project and receive energy-both positive and negative-through our own actions. Thus, in all the gain of my weekend, there will be some comparable loss. Not necessarily negative, but loss still the same. Perhaps I have already suffered it, and God allowed me to bask in the gain of the trials that have already been overcome. But regardless, just like with the extra hour I am happy to have gained on this weekend-good positive energy-to aid me in the day of loss that is sure to come.

Lord help me maintain my balance
as the arrogant man has no legs
to stand upon
when the winds of his own ignorance
blow strong
and I being he
at times
find myself falling
from all that I do not know
faltering
from all that I assume
it is only through you
that humility can be learned
understood
good and bad
are to life
what pain and joy
are to birth
both being the essence of existence
and the measurement of all worth
often depends
on the gain and loss
connected with
the acquisition of material things
but imagine if
all that truly matters
is our service to a higher power
our respect for all creation
and patience
in that which time will reveal
and the man less his arrogance
is healed
standing on
faith...

Saturday Gray...

I sit here at my computer, glancing out the window occassionally and it seems within minutes the sun was lost to the clouds in the sky...glances of gray influence my writing, slow down the mood. Not sadness, one of my favorite colors is gray but not the excitement the sun brings. It is fascinating at times, how color can make you feel differently-happy or sad-really amazing. Still, the grayness of this Saturday morning fills me with a calm; a coolness like a breeze while walking in wet grass in the morning when I was on the farm...long ago. Perhaps this will just be a chill day...no drama, not alot of excitement just a day to cool out and not do much. No deadlines, or needs to be truly addressed. Even if it is not supposed to go like that, I am gonna try my best to keep that type of vibe going all day. We all need these days...work hard, play hard and relax...well, just relax when necessary. That is what today is about, relaxation.

Color of the sky
cool as I
be
blues like
love supreme
sun seems
jealous of the haze that
overcast
its brilliance
brightness beneath
peeks through the seams
of clouds
stitched together
by raindrops
afraid to fall
be lost to the earth
far away from the sky
color of my coolness
calm
relaxation of grayness...

Taboo

Taboo. If something is taboo, it is that which should not be done...but not necessarily bad but maybe immoral; unethical, nasty even. I was actually playing the board game last night with some friends, girls versus guys and without a doubt the guys won (that is another blog in itself), but the game's name is what has initiated this entry today. Taboo. The name even sounds native...like African or Indian in origin. The funny thing about it though, this taboo, is that it is ever-so tempting. I think temptation and taboo are colleagues in a conspiracy against anyone on the straight and narrow path. In other words, the two are usually found in close company...working towards the derailment of standards. But even in trying to get someone to break a societal rule, by doing the unthinkable-there is something within every human being that is predisposed to want to break the rules.

Now the philosopher Thomas Hobbes stated that man was preoccupied with his own self-interest, and would do anything to further those interests. This is the whole rationale for the "man is inherently evil" theme, which is why government, or rather some system of rules are necessary for man to survive and interact with others like unto himself. However, the rules or government that is set up and which establishes the parameters of life for all within society is often created by whom-another man, or group of them. Therefore, the rules of which all must follow are the rules of the few over the many, and are based on those few individuals' personal conceptualizations of right, wrong, and what have you. Now, stay with me for a second...

So if one man or group makes the rules, based on their own experience, and I do not agree with their rules because of my own experience...should I be punished if I break them? I mean what is taboo to one, may not be to the other. Is there a universal truth that all men share and because of this all men are regulated by the same rules and laws? Well, if all men are regulated by the same rules then think of this...It is taboo for Michael Jackson to interact in a strange manner with little boys, he was put on trial for it-the rules said he should be jailed for his acts...but was it not taboo for Woody Allen to marry his adopted daughter, regardless of whether he waited for her to come of age to wed...for Senator Foley to send inappropriate messages to pages then claim he was a homosexual-alcoholic-abused child, and this was rationale for his actions. Neither he nor Mr. Allen have been prosecuted for their crimes against children...so how is Taboo defined-when all these acts with regard to children should have been labeled the same? (At least in my opinion they should all be taboo-even sick if you want to get real)

Regardless, taboo means different things to different people. My mother often says the world is so bad today, people are doing such evil things to one another. How did it come to this, she says. I often remind her that people have been doing evil things since the beginning of time. America sponsored a 400 year campaign on oppression and bondage...there is nothing more haneous than that. It is just that history is distorted by the victor, and truth is suppressed...expression of that suppressed truth thereof can be seen as taboo. We don't talk about the war in Iraq as totally wrong-just as a situation we wish was better. Death and destruction is taboo here...unthinkable. We are still in pain over 9-11, but does that justify pain being inflicted on innocent people globally...I should probably not even discuss this...that is taboo as well. Opinions, when they are not of the majority begin to be defined as such. Labeled as something they are not...soon thinking may be taboo too.

You betta not do that
you know it is wrong
you just betta sit still
and be quiet
you aint got that long
just a bit of time left
for you be free to do
what you please
so button your lips
swallow your morality
close your eyes to all you see
that dont agree with your
thinking
no one asked for your opinion
so do not provide it
and if you feeling emotional
about a particular issue
you best to hide it
aint nobody ever tell you
it was taboo
to speak of such things
to question the unquestionable
have thoughts
outside of the
box
you betta just close your
mind
and follow...
like all the rest

Destiny...

What is my destiny, yours? I go to work everyday, and although I do not hate my job, most days anyway, it has nothing to do with who I am. I mean, it is work and a decent check every two weeks but if I were to define me-well, my job lies far beyond the definition of self. But, it is a job none-the-less and I do not want the Creator to feel I am unappreciative. However, change is within my veins. I spoke to a lady just the other day who said she had been working at the this same place for 28 years. That is nearly my entire life, and she said her experience had been good but now retirement was all she looked forward to...the end. I do not want that feeling...ever.

Some call it going through the motions...or they liken it all to the need to "make a living." Still, just making a living has nothing really to do with Destiny, does it? Or is "destiny" in this sense just making a living...his destiny was the dead end job and following the routine of life. I argue that destiny is something more. Maybe it is because I buy into the notion that is perpetuated in every great story, for example it was Clinton's destiny to be president, it was King's destiny to lead the Civil Rights Movement...attributing destiny only to those who stand out amongst us and do things that are admirable to most. Perhaps that is the limitation of my sight with regard to the term. Destiny does not always have to be good...it could be someone's destiny to go to prison, to die in battle or be paralyzed on the football field. All could be defined as destiny...so again, what is it, this all encompassing term relegated to both victory and defeat.

To me, again in my limited sense of vision, destiny is the plan placed within your spirit by God at birth...the plan that he set for you upon conception. Now, I also believe you can deny this same destiny-which is somewhat contradictory so let me try to explain my theory. To me, God places a plan for your life within your spirit at birth, and based on the experiences you have in life various aspects of the plan are acted out. However, the plan is constantly changing and becoming amended as you grow...and there are times when God will place choices before you-as he feels you become mature enough to make decisions. These choices are usually of grand magnitude, and upon making a decision your life will be directed. It is at this juncture, when choice is made, that your destiny can be changed-take choice A and you end up at a certain place, take choice B and you end up somewhere very different.

Now, opponents of this theory may argue that regardless of whether you take choice A or B, you will ultimately end at the same place, perhaps not immediately, but in time and therefore your destiny is the "ultimate place" you end up at-and therefore, it cannot be denied. Both conceptualizations of destiny are logical to me, still I pray my destiny is beyond anything I can imagine at present...destined for greatness my wish,
admit that may be deemed a bit self-centered
but when I entered the world
the final chapter had already been
written
the route I would take determined by my
faith
belief in the unseen
and the mistakes I have made-
will make
along the way
were factored in long ago
before I was an embryo
a mere thought
in my parent's parents' imagination
I was destined
for something better than the best of my
ancestors
for they exist inside of my being
their accomplishments my own
my future patterned by
my family's past labor
and the Savior
perhaps within me he be
as well
I hear tell the gifts given
must be utilized
not hidden
or your destiny denied
so I sing songs of praise
for all that the Creator gave
to myself
and the lineage before...
for greatness
I wonder,
is that what I am
destined for?

Conception

It all begins with conception...life, the joy and pain to be eventually connected with it, well, that does not really matter at the very moment that it happens. "It" being conception, even if it is a thought or a dream or what have you-it is pure for only a second. Maybe even time cannot be attached to the purity of conception-thoughts, ideas, actions all will be judged...judged by the standards and morals of man, of one's socialized belief in good or bad, right or wrong, but prior to judgment...you know, it was just a thought or an idea. Life, it was an idea before it was-so is that when conception occurred, when the mind gave birth to the idea of it? I don't know, but this the first entry in my "blog" so to speak, and it has me thinking about the beginning of all things. What will become of this blog...I am more than uncertain yet it is a comfortable uncertainty. Will it grow like a flower, replenishing questions in minds of all that read...create a desire to debate, to state an alternative point of view to all that I relay? I hope it will be a sounding board, but that is to be determined in time. Right now, maybe someone will simply be feeling me, and the conversations I have been longing to have will take place in this very space. Perhaps...again, only time will tell and time tells nothing, before it is ready. I have never been one to question time...
never asked tomorrow what would occur
it would have answered me not
for I have no power over my destiny
no control of my life
and I know you like
but you can control your own actions, brotha
Yes, perhaps...but not necessarily the situation
they may put you in
and thus your response to
situations may be more
reaction than what you would have planned
to do
make you ask who is in control
of who
well it is easy enough
for me to understand
man
is in charge
of nothing...
and I being man,
than nor am I
I leave the questions I put before
time
up to God
to decide...
and thus I bask in the mere blessing
of
conception
asking questions of time
waiting to speak with
God
for the answers
yet God tells nothing
until...